Upload your own animations thanks.
Okay for a start, but there's a lot of key things if you're going to make this animation.
Since it's almost just audio, you NEED to make your audio as clean and as polished as possible. Not just so that you can understand what you're saying, so that ANYONE can understand what you're saying.
Towards the end there was a lot of mumbling, couldn't really understand what you were saying, was there a joke, or a punchline? Comedy or just a story? Couldn't tell. As well as inhaling, everyone gotta breathe sure, especially when telling a story, but you can edit those right out no problem.
I'd suggest you search for your own style, these minimalist drawings with hardly animation. Yeah, that's been done before. Not to say that you can't too, but if you don't wanna be associated i'd highly suggest drawing something that looks a bit more different.
And this is minimal, but it's probably something that just bugs me, and it's not anything to even do with your movie. It's the thumbnail.
The "WHOA LOOK AT THIS CHARACTER IN A WACKY POSE" along with the text, it's a very desperate attempt for clickbait. There's no real need to do that, especially here on Newgrounds.
It got me to click sure, but it was essentially to leave this review and tell you otherwise.
Overall i'd say try new things! This may be your first step but with animation you can do essentially ANYTHING you want, no need to copy joe-shmoe number one. Just make stuff you wanna make.
hey thanks for your tips man
and i will make better thumbnail that matches the topic
I clicked for boobs.
Did you realy? What a Rebel ! Such a cool Guy <3
Too many people voicing too many characters.
Inconsistent audio levels (some far too low compared to others), random audio in the background and peaking all over the place. If your audio is peaking, delete that recording and do it again.
Guessing you wanted all your friends to throw in their voices for this, which isn't really a good idea. Everyone's got a different mic setup, and most don't know how to record properly.
Everyone thinks they can do voice acting, but those without experience usually fall flat. This is a prime example. Some did good voice acting, others just spoke their lines in dull flat tones and did that "fake yelling thing when you can't really yell but are pretending to".
If I were you, I wouldn't even continue this series, it's a mess.
Needs something more simple with less characters involved.
Currently Episode 4 is in the works and it's the darkest episode of the series so far. And we wanted it to be the best episode it could be so a LOT of things are being done to do that. The characters that needed to be recasted were recasted and we got new VA's for them. After a VA finishes their lines, I'm handing the lines to RealWorldAnimations (Connor) to edit them of any background noise and to make the audio all leveled out.
The reason there are a lot of voice actors is mainly because of Episodes 1 and 2. In the first and second episodes, I pretty much voiced ALL the characters and I regret doing that as I can't do other voice impressions then my normal voice. So I decided "Hey! I'm gonna hire random people in the OSC to voice in the show" and that was a bad choice as some of the voice actors had awful or not-so-good microphone qualities. So that's why I recasted a lot of characters for Episode 4.
I am continuing this series because I know it can be. This is the first "real" series I've made and I know t can improve overtime. You can just look at Episode 1. That's something that makes me want to throw up when I watch it. That episode was made in July and this was made in November and the only episode separating this episode from that one was Episode 2. Episode 4 will have good writing (or I hope so), better voice acting (still not the best but I hope it'll be decent), and better animation.
So yeah I'm kind of bad at writing these type of things but I hope you see where I'm going at with this and that I'm learning from my mistakes.
Quality of the art was really nice, although this was something you'd see more in the lines of an animatic, i'll give this a pass. Let's call it 'stylised' and call it a day. And the live action parts where you woke up, is a nice contrast between the dream world and the real world. Thing like that makes it really easy for the viewer to immediately understand, good job on that.
And the voice work, top notch. You obviously know who does quality work, keep using those guys because they're a pleasure to listen to.
I'd love to see more like this, perhaps a whole series of dream related cartoons. With the same intro (and possibly outro?) so it keeps consistent. If you do make more, be great to see how things could look with some more time on it. The potential is there, just gotta put in the work.
Thank you very much for the review. BTW, it was my intention to give it an animatic feel, so you weren't far off using that description. I can't promise I'll make another one any time soon. It depends on what my mind conjures in the future.... while I'm asleep.
I find this very sexual.
Good thing you put "animation" in the title.
I wouldn't have been able to figure that out on my own otherwise.
But joking aside, there's no real reason for this cartoon to exist. Very much pointless.
The TV breaks, by no means. Then Gir gets angry. Then it's over?
I dunno man, whatever your intentions may have been here, it's extremely lacking in every way possible.
This is more like something you'd see from someone if they were testing things out, dabbling how to use the animation program of their choice. This should not be considered a full and finished cartoon.
There could have been more, this could have been better, if it didn't just suddenly end. Could have worked on this more and built up a whole storyline of who disabled the TV's connection, and Gir acting on his own to take them out. I dunno, just spitballing here.
Here's hoping you do better next time.
The audio mixing is all over the place.
Voices are about as loud as the background noise, could barely understand what they were saying, even though a majority of the script was just one word. And all other sound effects are crazy loud.
Not a very good contrast.
Some good ideas here. Character designs are very nice and so is the art.
The pacing could be a bit faster, a lot of shots lingered on for slightly longer than they needed to.
And that audio peaking, that's no good at all. A very common rookie mistake, but I suggest looking into fixing that before recording anything further.
Overall it's a good proof of concept, not ground breaking or anything, but I could see this getting a small following.
Yeah, a lot of this video was a first for me. And I know about the audio peaks as well, hahah! They hurt me ears, but you're right, I gotta work on that.
Thanks for the input, much appreciated!
Eyyy, daily first.
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